What is Domination/submission?

A lot has been written on this subject, it is a topic I find endlessly fascinating.

If you are serious about D/s, read the literature that abounds these days. You can check out Amazon online or visit the bookshop in Oxford St. It's always a good idea to talk with other Dommes and subs. You will find many different ideas and styles when doing so. No one is Dominant or submissive in the same way because we are all individually unique. Naturally you are welcome to come in and visit a Pro Domme at SK's but that would only be a small step for you in any journey into Domination and submission and learning about yourself.

For my purposes here, I will mention that D/s is ultimately about a power exchange between two people. The submissive turns their power, control, and body over to the Dominant who, in turn, takes on the responsibility of ensuring that the relationship (in a perfect world) is advancing, growing and developing. It is best to be able to agree at some stage where you want your relationship or session to go.

For years I have counseled couples who just don't communicate properly,a lot of problems arise from people not being prepared to be open and honest about their feelings. This applies to couples in a personal relationship as well as clients visiting us at Salon Kitty's

For ten years I was involved in a relationship as a submissive with a Dom male. Being a female in a position of power I found it gave me a balance to my everyday life as it was extremely challenging - I learnt a great deal from it. Many powerful people relinquish control for balance and a reality check, seems a pretty healthy attitude to me. Still today I find the best Dominants are those who can switch. This may be a a personal opinion but one formed from 22 years of observation. You can't really understand submission without at least trying it. Those who believe that anyone who switches is not really Dominant are sadly

The submissive's role is to serve his Mistress according to her instructions and training, but within agreed upon limits and boundaries.

In this exchange, the Dominant has the responsibility for, and the authority over, the submissive. The extent of this varies from player to player, and in my opinion, should be negotiated between the two. For example, some Dominants wish to control every aspect of the submissive's life, including career, contact with family, and so forth. A submissive might like to know about this before getting too involved with such a person. This is often a fantasy for both males and females however I've heard some horrific stories from both men and women who genuinely gave over their bodies and emotions only to be terribly abused. It happens.

Something to always remember there is no "one right way" to be Dominant or submissive. Anyone who insists otherwise is likely inexperienced, extremely egotistical, and/or downright dangerous. Beware.


But, Is it really being Submissive, or just getting what he pays

for? .... Men Pay for their fantasies of being submissive to women. But are they really? Or are they just getting what they pay for? .... Now, Reverse the situation. ... Do Women ever pay for Their fantasies of being completely Dominant over men, however They Want? .... Do such women )if they even exist), regard Stop Words as being an Insulting Iterruption to Their Fantasy & so Disregard them? And Finally,, Where does a very submissive man with a low pain threshold such as 'Myself',, find such Dominant Females? ...... I wouldn't ask, except, I am very broke. .... Regards,,, 'Mark'.

Looking for ideas re domination

As a domme, I am always in search of new experiences to have with my sub. We are not into s/m or humiliation, so this is all about the mind games for us. Suggestions?


i toally agree withAMANDAS comments
it is very easy to lose control of ones emotions and in doing so ignore the feeling of the other
sometimes i believe a genuine bond can develope between say master and sub
so that each not only enjoy their company but learn of life short asit is from each other


What is the difference between a pet and a slave, I have heard varing explanations, and would be interested in yours. I love your comment "Something to always remember there is no "one right way" to be Dominant or submissive. Anyone who insists otherwise is likely inexperienced, extremely egotistical, and/or downright dangerous. Beware."

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